Mon, March 28, 2011 7:57:00 PM
HAPPY B-DAY to Lauren Holmes, cousin Matt, cousin Tyler, cousin Cory, Cousin Mikayla, and anyone else I may have forgotton!! Sorry I´m such a horrible cousin, friend and person. I promise I love you all.
Ok, so remember Rosa? The old lady we live with who we baptized about a month ago? Cool moment of the week... one night I was having an emotional breakdown (cuz I’m a mess and also because I just didn´t feel like I was good to anyone), and anyways I came to the realization that her light was still on. So curious to see what she was doing up so late I looked through her window (she has a window to her room, indoors. Yes, I was a creeper), and she was staying up late, deeply involved in reading the Book of Mormon.. it was beautiful in a simple happy way.
Also, my three baptisms from last change all received the priesthood Sunday. I am so happy for that.. Martin told me I was instrumental in his miracle.. I have been present for most of the special moments he has had in this conversion. I look forward to seeing his progress and development through the years. He is already starting his own member missionary program to teach all of Nicaragua, by the way. It is awesome.
Also, a family we started working with told us that what impulsed them to invite us back was because we are not mechanical religious robots. That was neat. Also, fun fact, every time we have had the idea to pass by, we have popped in just when something hard happened or right when they needed it.
Today we had a super p-day and the hermanas, we all went to the mall for some odd reason. Anyways, I was walking through the stores and I was thinking about what life would be like after the mission. And I just felt so.. empty. And it kinda’ freaked me out a bit. I hope I still feel purpose when I go home.. Also, I felt super cheap. I saw the price $15 for a shirt and I about died. How will I ever make it in life? It is too expensive. Maybe I’ll find a job where I can work over the phone or internet and move to Nicaragua for awhile and just save like nobody´s business. I mean seriously.. I can live on a total of $25 a week probably. Maybe a tiny bit more, but still, the difference is ridiculous.
So today I woke up thinking that I wanted to mention something about goals in my letter to ya’ll. Not that I’m the best example n stuff of all I preach but I know that there is a power in setting and achieving goals. They help us grow, and they bring change faster, which is a good thing. If you say “ohhh, yeah” that needs to change, but don´t say when, do you really think it will happen? Do you really think that bathroom will get redone quickly? Do you really think everything will be done in time? ETC? If I were to tell you `hey! I´ll give you $1000 if you run!!´, where would you run? That way, this way, far, close, etc. But if I told you to run to the stoplight and back? Ya! There it is! You have your meta (target). You know where you are going! How can you get to where you are going if you don´t know where you are going? If you have some big general scheme cooked up in your mind, you KNOW that it is never going to go anywhere until you put times on it. Then you do all in your power to achieve it. Sometimes when we strive towards goals we don´t achieve all that we wanted to. But think of how much progress you will have made in the fight! More than doing nothing? And that is worth it. Every day we strive to put goals with people. For one reason or another they may not achieve it. They might even forget about it or decide that other things are more important.. that it doesn’t matter. But the people whose lives change for the better, who progress, who show more happiness? I have seen it. I have seen that those people are the ones that make and keep goals. They are the ones that are in processes of change. Here´s your task - put a timeline and steps on one of those unreachable goals you have piling up right now. Pray for guidance in achieving it. And then do it. It really is that simple, even when its complex.
I have a big testimony in change. That’s the reason we are here in this world. The Lord loves us as we are, sure, but he also expects something more of us. Life isn´t just about avoiding doing bad things, it’s also striving to do good things, to better ourselves, to seek the will of the Lord, to always improve. We will NEVER be perfect in this life but that is by far NOT an excuse to avoid trying. Change is scary. Sometimes we don´t know what to do, or where we are going. Sometimes the Lord charges us with a path which causes us to be a little scared at first, cuz we don´t know what’s happening. Idk where it is but there is a story about a man who was standing near a cliff. A cliff where you couldn´t see what was below or around. It was all a blur. The Lord said jump! And the man didn´t do it. He said jump again! And he still didn´t do it. He said jump once more, and the man did, and he flew. I´m not saying anyone should go jump a cliff. Don´t do that. I´m against that. But I am saying that sometimes the Lord gives us tasks we have to accomplish solely by trusting in Him. I know He lives. I know He´s got something special planned for us. I know that He takes care of us better than we really know.
Also we had like 3 different cakes throughout the day, INCLUDING A FREAKING CHEESECAKE oh my WOW I about died it was amazing. Also, some friends of mine showed up from León (my old area) to celebrate with me. AND the president’s wife and daughter surprise showed up with the APs. I really felt the love from all my family, friends, converts, and the general Nicaraguan people. 
